“I just haven’t had words.” That’s what I keep repeating when I’m asked about this space and it’s silence. This is the longest it has ever been quiet here, but I think it’s a good thing.
We are still in the airport. We spend time talking at length,praying, laughing, crying, watching distracting TV and finding ourselves exhausted by all of the above. Most days have been good. Some days I’m a mess.
And we’re listening.
I have thrown myself at the gate for the early flight and cried long and hard to be let on, and I have warily stood at the other gate and wondered if my feet will walk across that thresh hold. Most days I try to sit with my back to both gates, clinging to the God of the universe and the peace that I find in Him. We have prayed and not just for physical healing. God has been here at the gates with us and walked me through emotional healing, forgiveness, deliverance, and life. He is restoring my soul and has set free places in me the enemy had held captive for far too long. He has been a gentle healer and a warrior. I am forever changed because of His love, grace and mercy.
And we’re so very thankful:
For God who comes when we call and who pierces the darkness with His marvellous light.
For all of you who are praying, and crying out to heaven with us.
For those of you who willing to sit with us, regardless of which flight we are called to board.
For your love, support and encouraging words.
For our children who are walking with us,showing us grace and love.
(For a husband and best friend who passionately follows our good God.)
For kind doctors and nurses.
And we’re waiting…
There is one pivotal test result left to come. We are waiting as honestly as we know how. We have stood declaring our belief in the God who heals, and with the same breath we ask Him to help our unbelief. I am standing in the amazing things He has already done, and when I have no words left, I repeat these,
Lord Jesus, I trust you. Thank you for loving me.